Aerodynamics, Physics, Information technology... EFFFF.

What have I gotten myself into? Today was probably the funniest day I’ve had so far.

So I’ve written a little bit about how I don’t have much of a set schedule/ classes at the Academy- it’s all a bit disorganized and I tend to do whatever they tell me 10 minutes in advance. If that’s how they choose to use me, it’s fine, I just don’t think it’s the best way for their students to learn any English. So I told the guy who’s kind of in charge of me and his department whisked me off today to a separate department. Read on.

I’m taken into the Dean of the Pilots’ office and I sit down and start speaking with him. His English is like my Russian- he can understand it but can’t express himself too well. So we communicated by him speaking in Russian, and me responding in English. I actually understood about 80% of what he and the Vice Rector were saying, which was a mild accomplishment. Anyways, they’ve started a new program where they’re training all the pilots completely in English. They did their first year of school in Turkey where they studied intensive English, and now they’re taking all their coursework in English. In order to fly a plane outside Azerbaijan, they have to pass a certain level of English so it’s really imperative that they study English and speak it as much as possible.

Therefore, since they’re launching this new program, the dean wants to make sure that all is going smoothly. This is where I come in. They’ve decided that I’m going to sit in on their classes, talk to the students, talk to the professors, observe the classes, and lead a group with the students to help them with any and all problems and just to generally improve their English. It will be the same group of 15 students every day, which is relieving, so I can finally learn people’s names and have an impact on one group of people.

Anyways, to top this all off today, they bring me into a room where the students are taking a lesson in aerodynamics. I walk in and the rectors are like, “ask them questions!” to which I stand there dumbly and just ask “uhh… so who can explain aerodynamics to me?” and they all give me blank stares. I don’t even know what aerodynamics means, let alone what the class is supposed to consist of. So the I sit down, and the professor starts showing me some slides and I briefly glimpse the words ‘gravity’, ‘velocity’, ‘mass’ and my heart just starts sinking. Side note: I am absolutely horrible at science. Really terrible… the concepts always manage to escape my understanding. The annoying thing is that I’m actually really good at math and I really enjoy math, so realistically physics and math should go hand in hand, but not for me. Of all the sciences I’ve studied I am worst at physics. And it turns out aerodynamics is about physics. Lovely.

So I’m sitting there seriously just kind of smiling and trying to hold back my laughter that I’m in this situation. And in my head I’m trying to think of plan b, plan c and plan d on what to do with myself. The professor was speaking in English explaining aerodynamics but then he would break off into Azerbaijani to explain it better to the students. I was completely and utterly lost, and these 19 year old boys kept glancing back at me, terrified to speak in English in front of an American woman.

So then, at the end of the lesson, the professor goes, “ok, so this is the end. Will you quiz them now on aerodynamics?”, to which I actually think I started laughing (smooth move). I told him I didn’t understand anything about aerodynamics, which at first he took as an insult to his lesson. His English wasn’t very good, and he kept telling me he couldn’t understand me because I’m an American and my accent (more on that in a bit), so there were some communication problems. So then he starts saying, “well, you’re an aerodynamics specialist, right?” Oh god. Panic. No. So then I slowly tried to explain that I studied IR in college, not aerodynamics, and I hadn’t studied physics for about 5 years. The students got wind of what I was saying all started laughing. Great. So then the professor finally realized I can understand Russian, so he launches off into some lecture about aerodynamics and the students and all this stuff, to which I just smile and nod and start to block out after 5 minutes of desperately trying to understand.

Anyways I depart and go back to the rector’s office and he tells me all the different classes I’m going to be sitting in on and observing. He said I don’t have to stay the whole time (thank G), especially if it’s particularly boring or slow. They know I’m an IR major (although the professors aren’t clued into that yet) so I’m not totally into the subject. They just want me to observe how well the classes are going, the teachers, students, English level usage, which I can do. I can also help out the teacher rephrase questions, or maybe correct pronunciation and stuff. But I’m going to be sitting in on several different classes that are all technical and completely over my head.

This is what I kind of thought I would be doing in the first place, so I had already semi-braced myself for this kind of situation. It’s just hilarious to have actually lived through it. Just imagine my face when these guys started talking about aerodynamics- what does that even mean?! I must have been sitting there like a total deer in the headlights. I have a feeling these future adventures with this are going to be interesting. Maybe I’ll master physics… but I really wouldn’t count on it.

Anyways, about the American accent thing, most people here seem to be trained in British English, and it’s incredibly difficult for them to understand American accents. The teachers told me that American accents are actually easier to learn for people trying to learn English, but they have to start out learning it. If they learn British English first, then they have a really tough time understanding me. I have to make sure not to slur my words together and pronounce all vowels, although they still don’t understand me half the times. I’ve had a couple Azerbaijanis tell me that they understand me really well compared to other people, and this must be because they’ve studied American English. The other day I was with some students and I said “oh, there’s a lot of stuff there” (or something like that) and it took them a couple minutes to figure out I meant “a lot of” since I pretty much combined all of the words together, which I didn’t even notice. Add in my regional accent of Boston/ New England, and I’m dropping consonants and syllables, and adding random stresses. It makes speaking to them about five times harder.

A last side note- there’s been one woman pilot in Azerbaijan’s history (ever) and she was a Russian. So, the idea that these boys are going to have a female sitting in on their classes is totally new to them. Yessssss.